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How to Tell You're Married

 
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Majiken
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PostPosted: Sat Mar 17, 2007 8:27 am GMT    Post subject: How to Tell You're Married Reply with quote

1. Getting married is like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.

2. At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied, "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."

3. Before a man is married, he is incomplete. When he is married, he is finished.

4. Marriage is an institution in which a man losses his bachelor's degree and the woman gets her masters status.

5. A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get
married?" The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying for it."

6. Young son - "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
Dad - "That happens in most countries, son."

7. Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and then it was too late."

8. A happy marriage is a matter of give and take. The husband gives and the wife takes. Usually eveything.

9. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why. Affair?

10. Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.

11. After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The Husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice it."

12. A man placed an 'ad' in the classifieds. "Wife wanted." The next day, he received hundreds of letters. They all said the same thing. "You can have mine."

13. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing - either the car is new or his wife is new.

14. Marriages are like tornadoes. She moves in fast and leaves with your trailer.

15. Have you heard about the new toy for girls? It's called, 'Divorcee' Barbie.' Yup, she comes with all of Ken's stuff.
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2007 2:50 am GMT    Post subject: Reply with quote

**Being married means that you two can together take care of problems which you never would have had if you hadn't married in the first place!

** I know many couples being happily married! She's happy and he is married!

**Marriage: = money halfes and problems double!
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ddicerc
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2007 7:38 am GMT    Post subject: Reply with quote

Does Paula know you posted this, Joe?
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Majiken
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2007 7:50 am GMT    Post subject: Reply with quote

ddicerc wrote:
Does Paula know you posted this, Joe?



Umm... yeah. Of course she does. Cool



Truthfully, she read it and said, "Joke all you want, but you've never had it so good."


Can't say I disagree. She puts up with an awful lot. Rolling Eyes
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